My blogs sound like the ranting of someone overflowing with thoughts and feelings with no particular clarity. Which they are. I hope that I am able to find some clarity through these writings.
I have always felt concerned about the environment and somewhat alienated by my culture. I feel completely powerless to what we are doing to the world. How are we supposed to wake up each day and compete with each other for our egotistic desires while we drive this machine out of our exploited garden of eden? I often ride myself for not having figured life out by now, for not being more successful. But I don't know if I am composed of what it takes to be a success. There are just too many things going wrong in our world for me to promote my own existence.
I am not on the right path. I don't want success, I want the time to make art, the community to be social, and the environment to support the natural world. I can visualize that. A relatively self sufficient artist colony.
I know a number of people of people who have lived or were raised on communes. The conclusion is that they don't work. People get isolated, people get weird. Major drama ensues. Then they crash and most people move away, leaving some small core of die hard members that either become more mentally remote, or spend their time away from the community anyway. Thus the end. I think one hurtle is this us and them feeling. first of all, people moving to the country in a group probably have some major issues with the consumer based society they are leaving. then they band together and head to some remote place. Us and them. So once the us starts to show cracks they run back to the them.
I like living with people. If I leave my house I can't just be around people. I can walk the streets. I can pay money to sit in a bar. But I cannot be with people who are letting their guard down and just being themselves. Maybe it is a hold over from school, I spent fifteen years of my life waking up and going to a communal place. Sure sometimes people are loud and annoying. They are often messy, and then you have to watch them flirt and hear them have sex. But so what, I have experienced all that and we still wake up the next day and carry on. It is the amusement of our lives. Like my friends who watch and talk about their dogs interacting. Just something to do. I also believe that it is in our nature to live communally, That we will work together and are able to feed each other better than on our own, and that we use our resources better. I believe that the road to a more harmonious life style is through group living. That our materialistic society could learn from going back to the land. And that maybe this outlook could solve the us verse them relationship.
More ranting. It is all just an idea that I have no way to make a reality. But I think about this stuff, because I am trying to find in my own little way a path not to stop or change society, but to forge options. Because the world is being destroyed and I am bummed about it. And I feel like we are all a problem because there is no divergent coarse then the one we are on. There is nothing else to be but a carbon pumping world destroyer.
No comments:
Post a Comment